Here is a cautionary tale, friends.
About 5 years ago I was going through a rough patch at work. I was dissatisfied, unhappy and not in a good place.
And I told everyone about this – at every opportunity. If you ran into me, my conversation would have ultimately meandered into the topic of all the ills that had befallen me.
Before you judge me, know that what I was experiencing was an actual issue – and I had legitimate reasons to be unhappy.
But what I was doing was unproductive. I had become boring – by making random, unrelated conversations all about my misfortunes.
Then one day, my good friend Claudia Gonzalez, in a meeting about something or other said this to me. “Shereena, just stop. Stop with your story. You keep talking about this. Do something about it – but you need to stop talking about this.”
And she stopped me in my tracks. Right there, I had an epiphany. I saw with full clarity and with 20/20 vision what I had been doing, and which no one had been kind enough to counsel me on. I had been too self-obsessed to notice my unattractive behaviour.
So friends, start noticing what you are speaking about.
If everyone knows your story of how your manager wronged you or what this person said to you that time or how you have been denied that opportunity – then it’s time to change what you speak about.
Don’t be known for your story – especially if it’s a complaint dressed up as a story. It’s not interesting to anyone except you.
And as for you, Claudia, this was a life-changing moment for me – that hot august day in Pitt St. Thank you, my friend. Everyone should be so lucky to have a Claudia in their lives.
#changeyourstory #leadership #communication
